Family finds solace in each other as they wait for word from war zone
By Misty Volaski

When Brian Houle told his family at the age of 14 that he wanted to be in the Marine Corps, his father, Ray, didn't exactly take him seriously.

But by July of 2001, just a month after his Nordhoff graduation, Brian was already headed to one of the United States' most notoriously difficult boot camps at Camp LeJeune, N.C.

For the 13 weeks following, he endured heavy training, followed by a 54-hour, nonstop test dubbed "The Crucible," which pushes each potential Marine to the limit and beyond. The test, which cannot be passed without lots of teamwork, ends with a nine-mile run, by which time only about 20 percent of applicants actually cross the finish line to become Marines.

Brian was one of those 20 percent - which was no surprise to his family. "He's always been determined to be a Marine," said Ray. "We knew he would (pass)."

When it was all over, his family asked him how he felt. Incredibly, Ray noted, "Brian said, 'I enjoyed it. I got a little tired at the end, though.'"

From there he moved on to Camp Pendleton School of Infantry, where he learned the skills he would need in war. Brian's family said the school stressed teamwork and survival, and that Brian was only too happy to work his hardest.

"He liked it best in the field," said Ray. "He would call us and say, 'Don't call me for X amount of days, we're going into the field.'"
After his graduation, he was stationed back at Camp Lejeune, and remained at the base there until the beginning of March, when his family got the call they'd been dreading: "They're sending us to Iraq."

"But that's where he wanted to go. They were all so excited to go," said Brian's mom, Michelle.

At first, they said, Brian was reluctant to say whether they might be going to Iraq. They talked to other family and Jessica Stogsdill, Brian's fiancé, and by February, the family knew there was a good chance he might be going overseas.

"I think he wanted to protect his mother and me," Ray said. Brian boarded the plane to Iraq a little nervous, but not scared, said his family. "He wanted to go. They all did," said Michelle.

Brian left behind a sister, Angela, a senior in high school, and both parents at home. Not to mention Jessica. "She is so good for him," said sister, Angela. "She softened him up."

Long-time friend Naomi Eshoo agrees. "I never thought he would do that," she laughed, about his engagement. "He's always been so scared of that sort of thing. It's so great."

But that also made things a lot harder. Now, "It's like he fell off the face of the Earth," said Ray. "We have no idea where he is."

Ever since the onset of the war, Brian's family and friends have been glued to the TV, newspapers, and Internet, desperately trying to find out where he is. "I keep looking at pictures, thinking, That's him!'" Ray commented. "Then I look again and it's not."

Recently, the family got a letter from him, saying he wasn't allowed to disclose his location, and that he didn't know when he might be able to write again. They have not heard from him since, but the family remains confident they'll hear from him "probably after they take Baghdad."

"The danger factor is extremely high (for Brian)," Ray said. "That, coupled with not knowing where he is, makes it worse. Far worse. If I knew he was in the south, or the north or the middle I would feel better. We could know, hey today was a good day for him, or a not-so-good day."

Michelle and Ray say that all the military families are probably feeling the same.

" It's driving the families crazy. We haven't a clue where our sons and daughters are. The unknown is the scariest thing of all."

The family listens to the latest reports, hoping to hear about Brian's company, 2/6 Fox Company, of the Second Division, but thus far have gotten no word.

Regardless, "We're major proud of him. He's a damn good Marine,"said Ray Houle.

© 2003 The Ojai Valley News

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